 The other day I ran into a mom who was part of our homeschool co-op several years ago. My mind flashed back to those days. My daughter was really struggling then. In fact, our entire family was really struggling. But, it was important to me as a homeschooling mom to give my kiddos some opportunities – to learn from other teachers and to connect with other kids, so I set up a co-op.
As I try to do with all my parenting choices, I had to meet each of my kids where they were at. For some, they could jump right in, choose some classes, and be pretty independent. Others needed more of me so they were in classes I taught. For my oldest daughter, it was not easy so I had to keep her close, come up with a way it would work best for her. Initially, I got a lot of questions from other parents. Why can’t she be in the other classes like her peers? Why are you so hard on her? And those were just the questions they asked me. I’m certain there were more that they didn’t directly ask me. To be honest, it was really hard. Hard to be questioned. Hard to have my parenting skills doubted. Hard to be judged. Hard to do it differently than everyone else. But it was the only way it was going to work for my family. It was what my daughter needed, what she deserved. The gal I ran into the other day was the mom of two girls, one who had special needs. She understood about meeting a child right where they are at. She understood having to do things differently. The difference, her daughter’s special needs were visible. My daughter’s wounds and needs are often INVISIBLE to others. That is what often brings about the questioning, the judging, the doubting. So if doing things differently than everyone because that’s what works best for my child makes me look crazy, CALL ME CRAZY! Are YOU with me? For as long as it takes and NO Matter what, Stacy Manning P.S. Let's do this together! What to say and do in the moment, how to deal with others, how to create an action plan that works and SO much more is where you can be as a member of my Intentional Parent Coaching Group. I will teach you how to make a difference every day. It's time to stop just surviving and start thriving! Click here for more information and to get started today! http://www.tohavehope.com/intentional-parent-coaching-group.html
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 Just a quick note to remind you that sometimes you just have to
just GO FOR IT! I so get it. For many years I just didn't want anyone to know how hard things were and how crazy and unhappy I felt. As a matter of fact, there were days and weeks I didn't believe anything could change even if I knew how. Well, I am here to tell you that life can be SO much better! Many years ago I decided to muster up everything I had and just Go For It! Yes, it usually meant swimming upstream, doing it differently than I had ever considered, questioning from friends and family and those looks from everyone. I decided it couldn't matter. Neither could the words and behavior from my children; they didn't know how if felt to have a Mom that took good care of them or valued them they were scared. I couldn't take it personally. I just had to keep to the plan and go for it! It paid off. I figured out how to parent my daughters so that they could really heal...so that we could have SECURE attachment. So that they could be as happy as possible in life. The GREAT NEWS is that you don't have to figure it all out alone...you don't have to do any of it alone! I want to personally invite you to join my Intentional Parent Coaching Group where you will meet with me 3 times a month to tweak YOUR plan, be a part of a closed Facebook group, receive new insight plus tools and techniques that work and a vault full of 8 of my top selling classes and archived IPCG trainings and q&a's. This is huge! Right at your finger tips everything you need to make the shift happen. Aha moments, break throughs, and stronger, more solid family connections - that's what we are looking for - and that is what your family can have beginning today! Today is a great time to join us. You can still get in on January's LIVE training webinar. Don't hold back you and your family deserves SO MUCH MORE! Click this link to GO FOR IT Now! http://www.tohavehope.com/intentional-parent-coaching-group.html  I've been spending some time in a vacation rental while in Green Bay visiting family, so as my kids say, we have "Good TV." Anyway I have been able to watch the Property Brothers over and over - boy I love it! For those of you that don't know them, they basically help a family buy a fixer upper house and make it into their dream home. But here's the thing, as I watched multiple episodes I realized that our job as parents of hurt children is just not that far from what those brothers are doing...we're just not on TV!
First, it's about being able to see past the not so pretty outside and know what the potential really is...having a vision! Second, comes demo day. For the Property Brothers, demolition is only a few days long, but for us undoing the old beliefs, healing pain, and working to catch our kids up in every area is probably the longest part of the journey. Third, comes the reality of the project and that is that as you start to move the old stuff out (pull down walls, remove plaster, etc); there tends to be foundational stuff that really needs attention before anything else can happen (old dangerous wiring, leaky pipes, saggy floors). Now the whole job has changed...not what you expected! Lots of unknown at play here. This is really the deeper part of demo. Finally, when the foundation is strengthened and the safety precautions have been put in place and the walls have been moved and then smoothed out, the pretty stuff can begin to be put in place. The paint, the tiles, flooring, the decor, etc. Even this step takes time and experimentation...you really want it to all fit together, to flow and to feel like home. The reality is that whether you are the Property Brothers or an Intentional Parent, the process is important. The really important fact is that there is an order it needs to follow. The basics have to be dealt with before the pretty stuff! You have to take things step by step. The foundation has to be in good shape before big changes can be made. The process includes unknowns, many surprises and most of the time it is important that we are able to tweak our expectations a bit (or a lot). So, while the Property Brothers are out to create a dream home, YOU are healing a heart and creating a family that is flourishing...YOU really deserve the TV show. I like this idea, how about you? |
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