 This morning I woke up thinking of all the parents out there who are doing such an important job of raising kiddos - adopted, bio, foster, kinship, step, grand. Wow, it's a BIG job, isn't it?
So many parents come to me hurting. Exhausted. Worn out. Just getting by. Is that you? Then my answer to you...let's make it better. A LOT better. So many parents come to me feeling pretty settled, but their kiddos aren't as connected as they'd like. That attachment isn't as secure as it can be. Is that you? Then my answer to you...let's make the connection STRONG. Here's the deal...we all want our kiddos to be happy and healthy. Physically healthy yes, but emotionally as well. And when we can do that, the behaviors get better, things calm down, and we can create that family bond we set out to have when we began this journey. I can help you get those behaviors turned around. I can help you get your family to happy & healthy. Join me in my Intentional Parent Coaching Group. We meet online weekly where we can get you a plan and your questions answered. You'll also get access to an entire learning library of classes. And you'll be part of a closed Facebook page where you'll be surrounded by the best support out there. Seriously, this is making the difference for so many parents. I can't tell you how much better they feel...empowered, relieved, supported, equipped. Let's get you there! Join us today. http://www.tohavehope.com/intentional-parent-coaching-group.html
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 I was just talking to a parent the other day who had attended a class. The information was great. She was surrounded by those who "got it". And she left feeling energized and ready to try some new things.
Until. Until she was back home and tried to implement them. Wasn't working quite as smoothly as she hoped. Her "let's do this" energy seemed to be zapped not too long after re-entry into the real world. Here's the thing...the information she learned was good, but there was something missing. The missing piece was someone there to help her tweak those tools for her children. Someone for her to ask the questions after she went home and tried it. Someone to help her adjust and re-adjust as needed. And a way for her to continue to be surrounded by the support she felt at the class - from the mentor and the other parents on the journey. And that's why I designed the Intentional Parent Coaching Program the way I did. It's a place to learn new tools and strategies, yes. But it's also a place to have those tweaked for your family. A place to get your questions answered...as they come up, not just at a one time class. And it's a place to be surrounded by the best support out there...every day. It truly is making a huge difference for family after family. If you're ready to have the tools and support like you've never had before, if you're ready for things to be a whole lot better in your family, if you're ready to be energized, empowered, and supported...then you need to be in this group today. It WILL make a huge difference. See you in group! http://www.tohavehope.com/intentional-parent-coaching-group.html  So many Adoptive & Foster Parents come to me for help with fixing their kids.
They're stuck. Nothing seems to work. They're tired. They've tried "everything" and their child just won't change. He won't try harder. She clearly doesn't care. There's no respect. He just keeps doing the same thing over and over again and he/she is ruining our family! Here's the thing...putting your focus on changing your child is not where you should put your energy if you are looking to move your family to happy and healthy! Your Adopted or Foster Child's hurdles are deeply deeply rooted in the impacts of trauma, grieving, and life experiences. Expecting them to change means changing core beliefs and values. It means healing brain wiring. It means asking them to do or believe something their brain is NOT wired to do or believe. This kind of change could take a lifetime and it for sure takes safe (emotionally and physically), consistent, understanding, and intentional parenting. Really, YOU have a much better chance of getting you all to Happy and Healthy when YOU do the changing. When you learn to meet your child right where he's at, YOU create opportunities for success. You create a nurturing environment where new core beliefs are born - beliefs that lead to trust, understanding, and self worth. You create the safety your child's brain needs to create new wiring. Wiring that allows him to be regulated, have healthy relationships, and feel connected. Trying to change your child is exhausting and doing the same thing over and over even if it doesn't work is frustrating. You need to parent from a different angle than other parents or than the way you were parented. Your Adopted or Foster Child comes from a different place. Change your perspective, your tools and strategies so that you are meeting your child where he is at and the shift will be what you've been waiting for! P.S. Let me help you know how to change so that you can get your family to Happy and Healthy. Becoming an Intentional Parent is what it's all about! Join us today in the Intentional Parent Coaching Group. Click here.  I am so excited to tell you about a bonus going on in the Intentional Parent Coaching Group and it is ALL ABOUT DADS!
Here's what I know for sure...when it comes to trying to parent hurt children, Dads have their own journey, and many times it can be really difficult. Whether it's their tense relationship with their wife, not getting why their child seems to sabotage anything good, or understanding the lack of get-up-and-go their child has (and so much more), Dad's job is NOT easy. This bonus session is called "Help, Have You Seen My Wife I Think I've Lost Her!" because lots of times the biggest struggle of being a Dad is seeing your wife so miserable, being stuck in a negative cycle, and even looking a little crazy. It can change everything, including your marriage. SO, here's the thing...I am offering a session Just. For. Dads. I want you to feel free to ask the hard questions. I am challenging you to put it all out there, or at least cheer others on that will and take it all in. Questions like - Why does my wife not see? Why does my child do that or say that? What can I do to support my wife? What can I do to have a closer connection with my child? There's no unimportant question. Working with your spouse to create a Safety Net that meets your child right where they are at and providing your children a STRONG UNITED FRONT is imperative to healing...Dad, your participation is crucial! If your family isn't already members of the Intentional Parent Coaching Group, I want to invite you to bring them in. My husband and I have been there. This journey is rough and it took its toll on each of us and on us as a couple. We did this alone. Nobody told us it would be so hard. Nobody was there to teach us how to do it differently. We felt alone and miserable. I don't want that for your family...it doesn't have to be that way! I have put together the Intentional Parent Coaching Group to bring all the education, support and wealth of tools and strategies you need to help your family get to Happy and Healthy. Have the words you need in the moment, a step-by-step formula to follow to help make parenting decisions, a closed Facebook Group of parents in the same boat to bounce things off of and more. It IS POSSIBLE! The IPCG is a 30 day membership Group. As active members, you are invited to the Dads session for FREE and you and your spouse will also have 30 days to attend the weekly Live sessions with me so that you can tweak your family's action plan. There is always the Learning Library at your disposal where you will find 13 of my top selling classes for you to use at your convenience. And SO much more! You have the choice to get your family the kind of help they need - Let me show you how to create the changes you have been hoping for! Get started on consuming the classes in the Learning Library and all of the past coaching groups in the archived coaching area. And then let's get your questions answered in our LIVE DADS Session on this upcoming Sunday, June 25th at 5 pm central time! (worried about being there live? No worries...everything that happens in the IPCG is recorded and placed in the Members area for your use at your convenience.) Now is the time Dad...let's get your family to happy and healthy, join us today! http://www.tohavehope.com/intentional-parent-coaching-group.html Cant wait to see you in group and in the Dads Session!  The other day I did a little taking care of me (yes, I practice what I preach). I took a break out on my porch and read my favorite magazine, Oprah.
When I got to her regular article of "What I Know for Sure", I got to thinking about this parenting journey we're on. I asked myself, "What do I know for sure?" And what I know for sure is that we as adoptive, foster, & kinship parents really need to know and understand the impacts of trauma, how they look on our kiddos, and what we can do about them. It's no surprise that our kiddos have been impacted by trauma. They had a break in their primary attachment and that certainly is trauma. But so often parents don't know how that impacts their kiddo and what it actually looks like, let alone what they do about it. What can look like defiance, lack of cause & effect thinking, and low self-esteem are impacts of trauma. And how we parent has got to look different in order to help our kiddos if we want to truly help them. That's what is going to make THE difference for them. And that's what is going to calm things down and make a difference in your every day and your entire family. I'd like to personally invite you to join me in the Intentional Parent Coaching Group. We meet online weekly to dig deep into the impacts of trauma and get you a plan for your child. It's what I truly believe is going to be a GAME CHANGER! So...if you're ready for things to be better, a whole lot better, join us today! http://www.tohavehope.com/intentional-parent-coaching-group.html  Every day I talk to another Mom who is sad and overwhelmed thinking about how much her child doesn't like her, much yet respect her. Mom after Mom telling me that her child just won't do what they're asked to do.
They've promised rewards and goodies, threatened consequences and the loss of t.v. time, and everything in between, yet nothing changes. They say their child still doesn't get it. And it is clearly causing a huge disconnect in their relationship. What I want these Moms to know is that it really isn't about liking or not liking you. (And I say that with love). It's NOT about respecting or disrespecting you - It IS about a very commonly misunderstood IMPACT OF TRAUMA. It IS about not having cause and effect thinking! The whole idea of...If I do this, then this will happen. NOT THERE So do reward charts work? Do promises of something new work? Do threats of a punishment or disapproval work? NO. NO. NO. Now YOU have new clarity about your every day. A final thought for you...seeing behaviors, words, and choices as the impacts of trauma they are rather than defiant, disrespectful, and lacking in empathy will help you to meet your child right where he/she is at and to stay in it with him for as long as it takes - that's where healing happens. With love & dedication to your family, Stacy P.S. See your every day in a new way - join us in the Intentional Parent Coaching Group. Let me help you identify impacts of trauma your child is dealing with. Let me help you put tools and strategies in place to help both of you succeed. Let's get you learning the other impacts of trauma today. http://www.tohavehope.com/intentional-parent-coaching-group.html  The other night I was in my living room…all by myself. The house was silent. Everyone was in bed. With 4 teens, a hubby, and a toddler, that’s a big feat these days. I have to tell you it was BLISSFUL.
I used to be the kind of gal who burned the candle at both ends. With 6 kiddos who needed me, it was the only way I could get things done. But the other night, I sat. Quietly. Choosing to do nothing. Just soaking in the silence. It wasn’t for very long, but boy did it feel good! We need to find ways to rejuvenate. Reset ourselves. This journey is a tough one at times. Exhausting. And so we need to refuel. It’s not only important, it’s VITAL. I know, I know…"But there’s no time. It’s not possible. I’m too exhausted.” I get it. I told myself that time after time myself. But here’s the deal, it doesn’t have to be big. Even little things can refuel. Find something to do to take care of YOU. Need some ideas? Here are 10 easy, little things you can do.
Make a plan or be spontaneous. Whatever works. Just do it! And here’s the deal…when you refuel, not only will you feel better, but you will parent better too. That’s a Win-Win, don’t you think? With love & dedication to your family, Stacy P.S. A great way to refuel that will make a HUGE difference for you and your entire family - join us in the Intentional Parent Coaching Group. A place where you'll be empowered, equipped, and surrounded by the best kind of support there is. Join us today! http://www.tohavehope.com/intentional-parent-coaching-group.html  Listen, I know how crazy this journey can be - I've lived it!
What I want to make sure that you know is that you don't have to settle for things to be that way. Your summer doesn't have to feel overwhelming and be full of tantrums, arguing, and the other lovely behaviors that pop up when your family doesn't have a different plan. Look, life is TOO SHORT to have another summer that you just "get through" and hope you can hold on until school starts. (unfortunately, because we didn't have anyone to show us any differently we have too many of those kinds of summers on the books) YOU HAVE A DIFFERENT CHOICE! TODAY I am taking members of my Intentional Parent Coaching Group through a step by step look at how to make this YOUR FAMILY'S BEST SUMMER YET! And I want to personally invite YOU to join us. Stop feeling frozen and stuck. Worried and down. Let's get you my Successful Summer Check List and a step by step Plan to get you to a happier and healthier summer. Here's the huge BONUS...members of the Intentional Parent Coaching Group get this class for FREE and so much more. Check this out, the 30 day membership also includes:
And if you decide the group is not for you that's okay you can choose to cancel your membership. There's really NOTHING TO LOSE Here AND SO MUCH TO GAIN. Let's start TODAY to get your Summer more the way you'd like it to be, which will ultimately lead into a better Fall and a more peaceful school year. Don't miss this...the class is TODAY at 3pm! (don't worry if you can't be there Live -everything is recorded and you get to be part of it) All of the log in information will be posted in our Intentional Parent Coaching Group CLOSED Facebook Page so let's get you hooked up Right Now! Just click on this link and you will receive an email with all the details you need to be ready! http://www.tohavehope.com/intentional-parent-coaching-group.html I cannot wait to see you in group and I am so excited for you to have your best summer yet! With love & dedication to your family, Stacy  Yesterday was the last day of school for my daughter. All the rest of my kiddos were done last week. So...here we go. SUMMER!
For many families, their hopes and vision for summer don't always match how it ends up really looking. They picture carefree days. Relaxation. Fun. Happy. But...that's not always the case. Summer can be challenging for lots of kiddos. A big transition. Increased intimacy. Change in routine. Less structure. And that can lead to anxiety. Behaviors. Meltdowns. Struggles. Suddenly summer doesn't feel so happy and relaxing. As summer goes on, I get phone calls and emails from parent after parent after parent. They're exhausted. At their wit's end. Sad. Frustrated. And are counting down the days til the school year. But...it doesn't have to be that way. That's why I'm kicking off summer with an all new class...A Successful Summer. I'm teaching a step-by-step plan for parents to make this summer HAPPIER & HEALTHIER for their kiddo, and for their entire family. If want this summer to be smoother, happier, calmer...this class is for YOU! If you want to enjoy the summer instead of dealing with meltdowns, tantrums, and so on...this class is for YOU! If you want to have a plan that works instead of just hoping for good days...this class is for YOU! And to make it even better...this class is FREE for the members of the Intentional Parent Coaching Group. So join us in group today and I'll see you in class on June 12th! Let's make this summer a happy & healthy one for your entire family. http://www.tohavehope.com/intentional-parent-coaching-group.html  This weekend we celebrated the graduation of two of my kiddos. Two more done with high school. Wow, where has the time gone?
I am one proud momma. These two kiddos have come so far! Once again I was confirmed that meeting each of my kiddos right where they are at is one of the best things I can do for them. My son is smart, kind, and so, so creative. He has dyslexia, and that became a roadblock for him for a long time. I needed to meet him where he was at, and that meant choosing different ways for him to learn. Building his confidence. And letting him tap into his creativity. And...as I watched him beam at his party, showing people his film projects he has been working on, I can say - MISSION ACCOMPLISHED! My daughter has blossomed so much these last few years. A couple years ago, she started her own business - refurbishing furniture, country chic style. She is so creative and such a hard worker. This became her place to take chances and GO FOR IT! At first, she was pretty hesitant. Unsure. But...with some encouragement and knowing that she had a place to fall, she began to soar! I have to say...to watch her soar and trust that she has a place to land - MISSION ACCOMPLISHED! So my words to you...keep in it. Meet your kiddos where they are at. Be there for them NO MATTER WHAT so they can always trust in their landing place, their soft place to fall - YOU |
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