Oh boy, that first call from school for the year...ugh! Here we go again. "Your son is being disruptive, your son was disrespectful to the teacher, your son has got to change this or that, your son, your son..." Those phone calls are so hard and so destructive. Either you're mad and frustrated with the teacher or you're mad at your child and then even yourself - none of which helps at all. It seems like a never ending issue.
I get it, sometimes it seems like no matter how hard you try when it comes to school it is still a struggle. For so many of our children, the impacts of their losses runs deep and LOTS OF TIMES YOU CAN'T SEE IT. The early connections that were damaged were where the ability to regulate your own emotions comes from so our kids struggle with saying and doing the wrong things. They blurt out their feelings inappropriately to other students or their teacher or they go to the opposite extreme and hold them in until their bodies can't take it anymore and they end up touching or pushing other people or knocking things over or being too rough. Then throw in other hurdles, like not being able to read non-verbal cues very well or really not getting cause and effect concepts, and the snowball begins to form...the more they fail the higher their anxiety rises and the less ability they have - a recipe for disaster! Self regulation is key to surviving a classroom and being able to concentrate and be organized enough to learn in ANY scenario and our children NEED PRACTICE AND COACHING to be successful. Being intentional about HOW you send your child to school or HOW you choose to school your child is what will help him be more successful. Here's the thing, you are your child's external regulator for a long time. So, when you put specific plans in place that keep YOU in your child's experience, he will be able to regulate himself better. This is about BRAIN WIRING...not defiance! Whether at home or at a school, it really helps if you have a team that gets it or at least tries to get it to really make this happen. To help your child regulate better, you have to first put in place items, routines and consistencies that create a strong connection and then put in place easy to use CLEAR and CONCISE PLANS that will honor and support that connection NO MATTER where each of you are - together or apart. When your child's whole team uses the same plan pointing everything back to you "the external regulator", he will have MORE POSITIVE results across the board. Healing happens, new brain wiring happens! Putting a plan in place to create the connection that will ABSOLUTELY help your child regulate better is only one of the powerful things I will be teaching in my upcoming 4-part workshop series Your Child's BEST School Year Yet. There is SO much more....come and work with me along with two other schooling experts to gather the knowledge, experience and tools and techniques you need to create YOUR CHILD'S best year yet! Being an Intentional Parent means meeting your child right where they are at and teaching others to do the same thing - when that happens your child will be more successful! Imagine it...a school year that is more peaceful - your entire family will benefit from that! Just know...seats are filling up and I am keeping it small so I can work with each family to ensure they have a really effective action plan when the class is over! Get Registered today so you don't lose your spot! http://www.tohavehope.com/intentional-parent-master-series.html -I have priced this session to be really affordable! (less then my normal per class fee) -You get the recordings of the class if you can't be on live. -You also get the recording of 2 of my best selling classes as a GIFT from Me to YOU! Dealing With The Daily Grind: Eating, Sleeping and Bathrooming & The Power of Hope I am looking forward to seeing you in class!
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